Confronting the Taken-for-Granted
The process of losing and re-gaining credibility for women coming out at mid-life
Introduction & Methods
The purpose of this research was to investigate the coming-out
process for women at midlife, and to understand how this process of coming-out affects women’s health and health care relationships. Using feminist grounded theory, from the interview data we elicited an understanding of how women experienced the coming-out process, how the process influenced their health and health care, what they considered problematic about the process, and how they managed or resolved problematic issues. The basic social process (BSP) of Confronting the Taken for Granted illustrated how the central problem of credibility was experienced. The BSP has three phases: Facing Scary Love, Finding Me, and Settling In. Variables that impact on these phases are support and the concomitant micro-process of enduring perpetual outing. The findings provide a theoretical framework needed for health care providers to understand the coming-out process for midlife women and how it influences their health and health care. The theory provides new insights into the complexity for women transitioning to lesbian at midlife. |
Interviews lasting 2-3 hours with 10 women who self-identified as lesbian and who spoke English were conducted, audio recorded, and transcribed verbatim. With one exception, all of the women lived in eastern Canada.
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Findings - The "Confronting the Taken-for-Granted" Model
In Confronting the Taken-for-Granted, the basic social problem is the loss and gain of credibility that women experience when coming out at mid-life. This includes the three stages of Facing Scary Love, Finding Me, and Settling In as well as the concomitant conditions presented by the micro-process of enduring perpetual outing and the level and kind of support the women received.
Variation in this model is influenced by two conditions:
Stage 1: Facing Scary Love
The process of first realizing and acknowledging being lesbian, and uncovering and deciding how to overcome the implications of this realization. It is characterized by being abrupt and disruptive to everyday life, and it takes place primarily within the woman herself. There are several parts to this process:
Variation in this model is influenced by two conditions:
- Enduring perpetual outing: the recurring interpersonal micro-process of coming-out where each disclosure has the potential to undermine a woman's credibility, it begins with the woman's disclosure to herself or her first intimate partner and continues for the rest of her life as a lesbian
- Support: acceptance, love, and acknowledgement of lesbian identity as offered or withdrawn by family, friends, religion, and the greater community
Stage 1: Facing Scary Love
The process of first realizing and acknowledging being lesbian, and uncovering and deciding how to overcome the implications of this realization. It is characterized by being abrupt and disruptive to everyday life, and it takes place primarily within the woman herself. There are several parts to this process:
- "...And then I met this woman": becoming aware of falling in love with a woman is the turning point that initiates the process
- Recognizing something is missing: understanding the growing discomfort in the woman's heterosexual life
- Making sense: coming to understand what both the implications of a heterosexual background and the negative messages will mean in light of a shifting sense of self
Stage 2: Finding Me
A process of rediscovering personal credibility within a shifting identity while at the same time losing public credibility, it represents the transition from heterosexual to lesbian through a transformation of self. This process can be broken down into 3 parts:
Stage 3: Settling In
This is the process of the public transformation of self. It includes consolidating personal credibility, restoring public credibility, and accepting the legacy of enduring perpetual outing. There are 2 parts:
A process of rediscovering personal credibility within a shifting identity while at the same time losing public credibility, it represents the transition from heterosexual to lesbian through a transformation of self. This process can be broken down into 3 parts:
- Seeking affirmation: the crucial work of cautiously and purposefully disclosing their lesbian status to those around them
- Becoming selfish: the process of identifying their need for care, nurturing, and turning attention on themselves - a defiant affirmation of the importance of consciously caring for themselves, helps to reestablish personal credibility
- Doing what's in front of me: a concomitant process with the two parts above, women try to maintain balance with the familiar as a strategy to avoid a crisis situation at a time when their lives are forever changing
Stage 3: Settling In
This is the process of the public transformation of self. It includes consolidating personal credibility, restoring public credibility, and accepting the legacy of enduring perpetual outing. There are 2 parts:
- Reestablishing self as credible: continuing on with daily routines while assimilating new lesbian experiences and relationships
- Taking the bitter with the sweet: learning to manage the legacy of enduring perpetual outing by continuously having to disclose one's orientation and encounter assumptions about heterosexuality
Discussion & ImplicationsMost research that is published about the process of coming out explores the experience of gay men or adolescents. This study will help lesbians and health care providers better understand the process of women coming out at midlife and its associated challenges. The main challenge identified by this study was that of losing and regaining personal and public credibility. Health care providers who recognize that this loss of credibility leaves women feeling vulnerable and alone will be better prepared to provide support that fosters social inclusion by ensuring safe spaces for lesbians.
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Conclusion
Women in this age group are the biggest consumers of health care (Roos, Burchill, & Carriere, 2003); therefore, providers within the health care system have a unique opportunity to be able to provide the care and support needed to assist women in making healthy transitions from heterosexual to lesbian. Heterosexism and homophobia are two of the greatest barriers to health care for this population (O’Hanlan et al., 1997). Despite significant improvements to LGBT rights, there is still a great number of stumbling blocks to overcome before LGBT people feel that they live in a world without discrimination and threats to their personal and public credibility.
Citing this article
Original thesis:
Rickards, T. (2005). Confronting the Taken-for-Granted: the Process of Losing and Regaining Credibility When Coming-Out at Mid-Life. Master of Nursing Thesis, University of New Brunswick.
Click HERE to access a PDF of the above thesis dissertation.
Related publication:
Rickards, T., & Wuest, J. (2006). The Process of Losing and Regaining Credibility When Coming-Out at Mid-Life, Health Care for Women International. 27(6), 530-547.
Click HERE to access a PDF of the above article published about this thesis research.
Rickards, T. (2005). Confronting the Taken-for-Granted: the Process of Losing and Regaining Credibility When Coming-Out at Mid-Life. Master of Nursing Thesis, University of New Brunswick.
Click HERE to access a PDF of the above thesis dissertation.
Related publication:
Rickards, T., & Wuest, J. (2006). The Process of Losing and Regaining Credibility When Coming-Out at Mid-Life, Health Care for Women International. 27(6), 530-547.
Click HERE to access a PDF of the above article published about this thesis research.
For more information
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